==============================================================
Guild: Write Club
Channel: Archives-2026-August / 08-26-26-bd-allen
==============================================================

[8/13/2026 7:44 PM] bdallen_81124
https://bdallen.substack.com/p/short-story-vessel?r=2penkp&utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=post%20viewer

{Embed}
https://bdallen.substack.com/p/short-story-vessel?r=2penkp&utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=post%20viewer
Vessel
Short Story. A Tale of the File.
https://images-ext-1.discordapp.net/external/P9l6TI21jNRz5DcpqKqZYqDjA9ZvOoVsfcAviATyNIA/https/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/%24s_%21zABG%21%2Cf_auto%2Cq_auto%3Abest%2Cfl_progressive%3Asteep/https%253A%252F%252Fbdallen.substack.com%252Fapi%252Fv1%252Fpost_preview%252F185371684%252Ftwitter.jpg%253Fversion%253D4

{Reactions}
❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 6:12 PM] starcryst
@BD Allen good?

{Attachments}
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/1536890704029024276/1542295704922226688/Vessel.png?ex=6ab8ec0e&is=6ab79a8e&hm=24d31e49e699cf5fc720c5176922c5fda27ae560ab38a0e992ad509c41a90dd5&


[8/26/2026 6:18 PM] starcryst
@everyone if you'd like to help promote tonight's author @BD Allen and his story Vessel, please click on the link below and like / restack. Thank you! https://substack.com/profile/408299644-david-t-etheredge/note/c-323373448

{Embed}
https://substack.com/profile/408299644-david-t-etheredge/note/c-323373448
David T Etheredge (@davidtetheredge)
Tonight at Write Club we have author @BD Allen’s story Vessel. Read the story below (linke below) and show up on our Discord server WriteClub.Chat at 7pm EST with feedback / questions for the author! 

https://bdallen.substack.com/p/short-story-vessel
https://images-ext-1.discordapp.net/external/8hKeeWPCT6BikKdN_P_n9MFOHdSJekfVMncdAsAs86s/https/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/%24s_%21wojO%21%2Cf_auto%2Cq_auto%3Agood%2Cfl_progressive%3Asteep/https%253A%252F%252Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%252Fpublic%252Fimages%252Fb4ea7976-d886-48d7-93b6-80eb7bc001ab_1672x941.png

{Reactions}
❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 6:19 PM] starcryst
One note - the story does include the death of a child - just want people to be aware in case that is a concern. It's not gratuitous.

{Reactions}
💯 (2) ❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 6:58 PM] vesperlrayne_04128
I have a guest over and can't make it, but here are my two cents - This is well outside what I would normally choose to read. I tend to avoid gore, and being a mother of two,  descriptions of children being hurt are especially difficult for me. Even so, I found myself drawn into the storytelling technique. 
The inverted phrasing—“His anger is a burning brand, the boy’s”—gave it the feeling of a story being spoken rather than written, almost as though someone were recounting it beside a fire. You have a really strong command of cadence and pace. The repeated lines and the movement between dense description and short, blunt statements made the prose feel hypnotic and, at times, genuinely mesmerizing.
It may not be my usual kind of story, but I could absolutely appreciate the skill with which it was told.

{Reactions}
❤️ (7)

[8/26/2026 6:59 PM] starcryst
Thank you Vesper


[8/26/2026 7:01 PM] starcryst
https://klipy.com/gifs/presentmic-thumbsup

{Embed}
https://klipy.com/gifs/presentmic-thumbsup
Presentmic Thumbsup
https://images-ext-1.discordapp.net/external/neKAJIsQVG4TIbOkDCnFjx106D7Ytq0gnzX72kVhN0I/https/static.klipy.com/ii/4493325008d34b7bf8cd6813cd5c1619/78/bf/vkoLuI06TfDePj7i.webp

{Reactions}
🔥 (3) ❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:01 PM] bdallen_81124
I definitely don't expect this to be for everyone, but thanks so much for looking beyond the really hard stuff.

{Reactions}
🔥 (2) ❤️

[8/26/2026 7:01 PM] williamhuntley4139
👋

{Reactions}
❤️ 🔥 ❤️‍🔥 (2) 🎉

[8/26/2026 7:01 PM] starcryst
@everyone WELCOME to WRITE CLUB!

{Reactions}
❤️ (3) 🔥 (2) 🥂 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:02 PM] starcryst
If you are new here tonight -- WELCOME

{Reactions}
🫣 ❤️‍🔥 🎉 🙌

[8/26/2026 7:02 PM] starcryst
we are thrilled to have you. Here is the format for tonights event:

{Attachments}
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/1536890704029024276/1542308335557017702/Write_Club_Chat_Format.png?ex=6ab8f7d1&is=6ab7a651&hm=65e0ecdbc356aae4aed23626f8ed97e97eab4e47cbf18cfab61c9bc0e6807133&

{Reactions}
🔥 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:02 PM] somedesertrat
https://klipy.com/gifs/akiba-maid-senso-otagei

{Embed}
https://klipy.com/gifs/akiba-maid-senso-otagei
Akiba Maid Senso Otagei
https://images-ext-1.discordapp.net/external/CTz6JLPaOOYlE6uUgcjZ943ZqOtX7LJ6vaJtCksCOzQ/https/static.klipy.com/ii/a8ada81afc59159ea5c8927feffa2e31/f3/dc/3FCsT5Zm2ooNP9AI.webp


[8/26/2026 7:02 PM] williamhuntley4139
I am new here tonight. And it is laaaate in the UK

{Reactions}
❤️ (2) 🫶 💯 👋

[8/26/2026 7:03 PM] starcryst
If you are ready to share feedback on the story, please raise your hand using the yellow rubber dishwashing glove emojis!


[8/26/2026 7:03 PM] thegalacticwriter
👋


[8/26/2026 7:03 PM] lammbbb
✋


[8/26/2026 7:03 PM] rubygs
👋


[8/26/2026 7:03 PM] somedesertrat
👋


[8/26/2026 7:03 PM] hammondjohns
👋

{Reactions}
🔥

[8/26/2026 7:04 PM] starcryst
@BD Allen what level of feedback would you like tonight? Care Bear or Demon Possessed?


[8/26/2026 7:04 PM] _randym
👋


[8/26/2026 7:04 PM] erisindex
👋


[8/26/2026 7:04 PM] bdallen_81124
Demon possessed care bear!

{Reactions}
🤣 ❤️

[8/26/2026 7:04 PM] somedesertrat
https://klipy.com/gifs/bold-strategy-dodgeball

{Embed}
https://klipy.com/gifs/bold-strategy-dodgeball
Bold Strategy Cotton - Dodgeball
https://images-ext-1.discordapp.net/external/UVLUCx33LsFH-PIn-LLD0_jlm_f38Zm-HwJ_RweQlqw/https/static.klipy.com/ii/d7aec6f6f171607374b2065c836f92f4/b7/a3/mLhIaGPu.webp

{Reactions}
🔥 😆 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:04 PM] bdallen_81124
THis isn't my first rodea so I can take it


[8/26/2026 7:04 PM] erisindex
I want that teddy

{Reactions}
💯 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:04 PM] starcryst
Say horrible things about his story, but do it sweetly! Got it.

{Reactions}
🤣 (2) ❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:04 PM] lammbbb
oh basically my existing technique

{Reactions}
🤣 (4) 💯 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:05 PM] starcryst
Okay when you share - remember to say DONE when you are finished!


[8/26/2026 7:05 PM] starcryst
@Will (Prog Fantasy) GO!


[8/26/2026 7:05 PM] williamhuntley4139
I type:

{Reactions}
🔥 (2) 🥳 (2) 💖

[8/26/2026 7:06 PM] williamhuntley4139
This was hard-hitting on an emotional level, and you clearly write well on a sentence-to-sentence level! I slightly struggled to grasp who was who and how they were related, but I am very sleepy. Great work! DONE!

{Reactions}
👍 (3) 🫂 🛌

[8/26/2026 7:06 PM] starcryst
While Will is Typing -- we've had a fair request by Vesper that we ask authors to provide content warnings in the future if there is anything in a story that might offend

{Reactions}
❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:06 PM] starcryst
@The Galactic Writer GO!


[8/26/2026 7:07 PM] thegalacticwriter
Hi, BD! I’m not going to text bomb my answers….😏 Your storytelling kept me in suspense. And your dialogue truly blew me away. 

Favorite passages: 

He glares, his eyes on fire; shadows dance from the black welts carved into him from the lashings and sigils. 

“If this woman can rid him of the demon then why not? We can give her some of the coin, take the rest for ourselves and damn those villagers. Does anyone fuck for this Kuton? If he’s even there.”

“Replenishing the ranks? A gift for Finister? Oh, Fin, I didn’t see you there.” 
“Ota.” Finister averts his eyes. His whole demeanor, in fact. Poor rat. 

The boy cooperates as I lock our chains to her brackets. Heavy-eyed, he scans the artifacts around him, all beyond his grasp. I check his ankle chains and wrists and leave him there.
I push Gormire out of his reach. 

I loved that last line. We can see the action and know both characters. I thought this was brilliant.

{Reactions}
🔥 (2) ❤️ (2) 🙌

[8/26/2026 7:07 PM] williamhuntley4139
PS. Good night 😴

{Reactions}
❤️ (2) 🛌 (5)

[8/26/2026 7:07 PM] thegalacticwriter
Compliments: maybe it’s just me, but I caught a bunch of one liners in this piece and they are spotlight-worthy:

Gormire freezes, catching a girlish squeal in his throat. 

Gormire blanches under her glance. Finister slinks behind the Captain’s great figure. 

A quiet snarl escapes Finister’s throat. 

He responds with a predatory gaze no boy his age should have. 

Overall—so much fun to read, story engaging. Nice to read your work! Can’t wait to see what demon drink we’ll have at the after-party!!

DONE!!!!

{Reactions}
🔥 (3) 🍸 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:07 PM] starcryst
@Lunetois GO!


[8/26/2026 7:08 PM] lammbbb
> “Don’t touch anything,” she says, and Gormire’s hand flinches back from a bright concoction in a bowl—I can hear a siren-call in it.
A good sorceress knows well that Gormire's hand cannot stay itself without a little bit of instruction.

{Reactions}
🔥 (5) ❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:08 PM] lammbbb
This story has a lot of sword-and-sandals vibes; perhaps elevated. There's also something alien or ethereal about it; the story itself is not just the first-person perspective, but rather a first person perspective of a person wholly immersed in the world talking to someone who is not only his countryman but also his colleague—or at least the amount of foreknowledge the narrator assumes on our part seems to suggest we are of the same region of occupation as he (or she?) is. It's very immersive.

{Reactions}
❤️

[8/26/2026 7:08 PM] lammbbb
I get a bit of Numenara vibes as well


[8/26/2026 7:08 PM] lammbbb
My criticism is that perhaps it might be *too* alien and ethereal. It leaves a lot to the reader to imagine on their own. I've heard authors say they don't like to overdescribe characters because it could be perceived as navel-gazing, and I shamelessly admit that I live inside of my own navel. However, when I read something that is simply a list of things that happened with limited imagery, I can't help but feel like an opportunity is lost to show the reader a spectacle and amaze or fascinate them.

{Reactions}
👍 (4) ❤️

[8/26/2026 7:08 PM] lammbbb
I'm finished. Thanks for sharing tonight.

{Reactions}
❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:09 PM] starcryst
@steffie GO!


[8/26/2026 7:09 PM] rubygs
Favorite Line: “Those two embers never blinked in the dark.”-ooooh good line. Spooky.
Critique: “I won’t countenance that woman.” -Something about this line doesn’t sound right to me. Maybe countenance isn’t the right word.
He lounges vs. He received it. - I think there’s some tense issues that need to be resolved.
The description is interesting but I’m a little confused. I assume the boy broke loose and killed Fin and the other one but it’s not well explained.
“There is sound in a chase. Honed. My own feet on pinestraw and rock.” The language is beautiful but again there’s the verb issue and it doesn’t really describe the action clearly. Definitely could use more description IMO. 
I LOVED the Sorceress.
The ending was fuzzy for me, I’m not sure if the boy threw himself into the Kuton or what, but I’m definitely looking forward to reading more and finding out!

{Reactions}
❤️ (4) 💖

[8/26/2026 7:09 PM] rubygs
Done


[8/26/2026 7:10 PM] starcryst
@Carl Price GO!


[8/26/2026 7:10 PM] somedesertrat
General Feedback: Overall, this was a good read for me. It had a very classical fantasy feel to it with touches of modern 'grimdark' and how the prose was structured something akin to an epic poem or possibly a Childe Ballad.

{Reactions}
💯 (3) ❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:10 PM] somedesertrat
Fave Scene: 

It's not so much a scene, but a sequence of the narration- 
> There is stillness in death, it seeps out into the world...
leading into
> There is sound in a chase. Honed...
continuing with
> There is stillness around us but not ahead...
Moving towards
> ...there is blood.
Ending with
>Silent.

The more that I read over this sequence, the more I notice connections not just with the paragraphs themselves, but how the smaller segments of the scene relate to it. Honestly, I would have liked to have seen that type of pattern repeated.


[8/26/2026 7:10 PM] somedesertrat
Constructive Criticism: I understand the intent behind switching between the paragraphs, especially when you sequence it from past participle to past perfect to present tense. Within the opening paragraphs, though. there's verb tense switching that made it confusing to follow until everything had settled. This is most noticeable to me in the second through fourth paragraphs, where we jump from past participle (We *had* passed...) to past perfect (the villagers begged) where the sense of 'when' is disconnected.

{Reactions}
👍 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:10 PM] somedesertrat
I would have liked a little bit more overt characterization of the squadmates to get more of an idea of their personalities outside of drawing everything from subtext. Your header flat out says that it's a strange new world you know next to nothing about though, so I think you were in the same boat--I could be wrong, though.

{Reactions}
❤️ (6)

[8/26/2026 7:10 PM] somedesertrat
Question: How much do you know about this world now, since you dropped this piece in January?

{Reactions}
❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:11 PM] somedesertrat
DONE


[8/26/2026 7:11 PM] starcryst
@Hammond GO!


[8/26/2026 7:11 PM] hammondjohns
Overall: The prose style was effective in setting the mood and tone. I gather this is part of a wider project and universe, and I was able to follow it reasonably well even if I didn’t get the significance of some of the references. But in a couple of places they pile up in succession which was a little disorienting. 

Favorite line: There is stillness in death, it seeps out into the world. You can hear it in the trees and shrubs, all silent.

Criticisms/Opportunities:
- I don’t know if it’s just me, but I have just been binging Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace and can no longer take a word like “Mayhap” seriously.
- “She damns it behind a wall of power, but I see.” I think you mean “dams”
- I was a little confused by the transition from them discussing the boy in the garden to the discovery that he has killed some of the party and escaped (that’s what happened, right?). I got there eventually, but I needed to reread it to make sure I hadn’t missed anything.

Question for the author: Where does this story fit in your wider project?

{Reactions}
🔥 (5) ❤️ (4) 🎉

[8/26/2026 7:13 PM] starcryst
@Hammond done?


[8/26/2026 7:13 PM] hammondjohns
DONE


[8/26/2026 7:13 PM] starcryst
@Randy M back to take revenge on the next author! GO!

{Reactions}
🔥

[8/26/2026 7:13 PM] hammondjohns
Whoops!

{Reactions}
❤️ (4) 👮‍♂️ (4) 🚓 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:13 PM] _randym
It's haunting. 
There's a lot of well-chose words, such as:
"his face drops, his shrewd gaze sinks into torpor."

The alien culture (as in, very distinct from ours) is well and economically communicated. 

The world being named "File" kind of tripped me up, I wondered if it was a simulation or something.

Being so deep in point of view, I'm not entirely sure what was actually happening sometimes; what afflicted the boy, where he's going at the end. Seems the big dangerous god is being woken up?

Well penned and enjoyable, though!
DONE

{Reactions}
❤️ (5) 🔥 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:14 PM] starcryst
@Eris Index GO!


[8/26/2026 7:14 PM] erisindex
One day I'll get this shortened according to the rules..


[8/26/2026 7:14 PM] erisindex
Fav lines: (This has Erikson written all over it. House of Chains– Karsa baby.. “WITNESS”)
“Even Finister, a plier of the dead, was repulsed at the lengths to which they went to cleanse the boy, and the strength with which the demon resisted.” –This was such a good, crafty line. I don’t know who Finister is, but you give me a good feeling of his character here. Character work and some worldbuilding.

{Reactions}
❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:15 PM] starcryst
GO long tonight - we have time 🙂

{Reactions}
❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:15 PM] erisindex
“So, there he squats beyond the light. He glares, his eyes on fire; shadows dance from the black welts carved into him from the lashings and sigils.” –I absolutely am obsessed with this badass imagery.

{Reactions}
❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:15 PM] erisindex
“I pull on his neck chain and his body relaxes.” –Arrghh. I understand the restraints, but this sentence had me feeling so bad for the kid, and made me want to whop those guys. Excellent crafty line.

{Reactions}
👍 (3) 🤣

[8/26/2026 7:15 PM] erisindex
Fave scene: 1st fav scene is when the sorceress closes her eyes for a moment, and whispers under her breath, and when she opens her eyes back up there’s some badass imagery going on. That section also tells me something is up, something worse than a demon maybe?

{Reactions}
❤️ (4)

[8/26/2026 7:15 PM] erisindex
The cave within is low, but flat and dry. The wide mouth keeps it well-lit. She has an open hearth; game hens hung to salt and smoke. She has tables of concoctions, dissections and spell drafts. A canopied bed is tucked behind a screen. ← This scene, the description of her cave. It is freaking awesome! Love this description so much. I can see it perfectly. 
And also, the entire paragraph beginning with “Which village did you say?” It’s a fairly long paragraph, and it’s really fragmented- the sentences, I mean- but the writing is premium. Loved the narrator’s voice in it.


[8/26/2026 7:16 PM] erisindex
Crit: I really loved this, but some of the fragmentation threw me off. A lot of it works really well with the narrator’s voice, and I think most of it is intentional, but there were places where I had to reread to figure out whether we were in the present, a memory, or somewhere else. The “Which village did you say?” paragraph is one example.
I also got genuinely lost near the end. One second Ota is explaining what she thinks is wrong with the boy, and then suddenly Gormire and Fin are dead, the boy is gone, people are running, and we’re in a chase. I understood what was happening again once they found his trail, but I never really understood what happened in the cave or how we got from one moment to the next. I think that section needs just a little more connective tissue because the confusion pulled me out of an ending I otherwise really liked.

{Reactions}
👍 (5) 🔥

[8/26/2026 7:16 PM] erisindex
Overall–I thoroughly enjoyed this piece. I loved the narrator’s voice and the imagery; even though it was sometimes a bit confusing, I still had a blast with it. Premium writing voice.
And… this narrator reminds me SO MUCH of Karsa Orlong. Hard, old-world warrior brain and similar sentence fragmentation. I LOVE HIM. Oh, I’m fangirling Erikson again. Shit.

{Reactions}
❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:16 PM] erisindex
Question–What exactly did the villagers do to the boy during the “cleansing”? Did they actually change whatever was inside him, or was whatever he became already there and they just made it worse? 
DONE. 
'

{Reactions}
❤️ (2) 👍

[8/26/2026 7:16 PM] starcryst
Okay do we have any LURKERS tonight who want to jump in to provide feedback??


[8/26/2026 7:16 PM] starcryst
Feel free to get your hands up while I go!


[8/26/2026 7:17 PM] starcryst
General feedback: This feels very much like the Malazan books or the Black Company. Very enjoyable read for the first half of the story. The back half was confusing and it undermined the strong start somewhat.

{Reactions}
🔥 (2) ❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:17 PM] josisofer
👋


[8/26/2026 7:17 PM] starcryst
Favorite line(s): 

Finister, rat-like even at his best, stoops his hooded head, his hooked nose toward the dirt as if catching the scent of perfume. A worrisome perfume to him. “Most like.” <<< wonderful characterization.

{Reactions}
🔥 (4) ❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:17 PM] starcryst
I loved this description - it was so characterful.

{Reactions}
❤️ (3) 🔥 (3)

[8/26/2026 7:18 PM] starcryst
The mountain troubles the horizon with smoke and, once, we felt a rumble in the earth. <<< loved use of the word troubles.

{Reactions}
👍 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:18 PM] starcryst
Insects tide over our boots. <<< great description!

{Reactions}
❤️ (4) 🔥 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:18 PM] starcryst
That was a fantastic visual image with such economy of words

{Reactions}
❤️ (3) 👍 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:18 PM] starcryst
Critique - the flashback was confusing. It didn't have enough delineation from the rest of the story for me to cleanly separate the two and there were too many new ideas coming too quickly and without enough exposition to anchor it.

{Reactions}
❤️ (3) 👍 (3)

[8/26/2026 7:19 PM] starcryst
half of us reining the Beast of Jantra’fail, a berserker, of sorts. 

<<< this sequence was unclear because we're trying to figure what the beast is, how reigning is being used in this context, what the swampy hamlet village is and who the band of boys are. To much new stuff coming too fast.

{Reactions}
👍 (5) ❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:19 PM] starcryst
We had interupted something for sure, and they brought the poor bastard back out to finish because they already knew they were going to kill us. 

<<< same here - who is this? what are they doing with him? why are they showing him off especially if they are going to attack the soldiers?

{Reactions}
❤️ (4) 🔥 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:19 PM] starcryst
And the flash back would benefit from horizontal rules or some other separation from the main story.

{Reactions}
❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:20 PM] starcryst
Finally - it wasn't clear to me what happened from the point that the boy escaped and killed the men in the cave. I had to read it three times to work it out and I'm still not absolutely clear on the ending.

{Reactions}
👍 (6)

[8/26/2026 7:20 PM] starcryst
So -- loved the first half, wanted to love the last half, but I was confused

{Reactions}
👍 (3) ❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:20 PM] starcryst
DONE


[8/26/2026 7:20 PM] starcryst
@Josi Sofer GO!


[8/26/2026 7:20 PM] josisofer
Favorite Scene: The chase at the end. It feel gruesome in the best way.

{Reactions}
🔥 (5) ❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:21 PM] josisofer
Favorite Lines: 

“I don’t know,” she confesses and there is fear in the confession because there will be no absolution on the other side of it. Ignorance is never rewarded in this world. “He is not demon-haunted. Or he is, but it has been transformed. Into? I don’t know what. A boy? But these villagers wanted you to bring him to Kuton—you shouldn’t. We’ve been gone too long.”

{Reactions}
❤️ (4) 🔥 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:21 PM] josisofer
You explained nothing yet escalated the stakes simultaneously at the end of the story. That is serious skill and I'm envious you can do that.

{Reactions}
❤️ (3)

[8/26/2026 7:22 PM] josisofer
Positive Critique: You have the first-person POV style down pat, and this feels like a story told around a campfire on a beach. If that was intentional, lean into it and fill out this world for us. Your have literary prose skill, there’s not a single sentence I could find being improved.

{Reactions}
❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:22 PM] josisofer
Criticism: I couldn’t visualize any of this until the chase through the assumingly-jungle forest below the volcano. Even then, it’s vague and undercooked for me. I had to pay too much attention to each sentence to get a feel for the story, which was distracting. Though each sentence is crafted beyond my ability, and I pride myself on my sentence construction abilities, they don’t connect well when I read them. Could be a me thing, or you're too high art for my reading abilities, or your biggest strength is also your weakness.

{Reactions}
❤️ (4) 💯 (3)

[8/26/2026 7:23 PM] josisofer
Done


[8/26/2026 7:23 PM] starcryst
okay anyone else?


[8/26/2026 7:24 PM] starcryst
all right we are trying something new tonight -- @BD Allen please take a minute to share any last thoughts you have for the room.

{Reactions}
❤️

[8/26/2026 7:24 PM] starcryst
WHILE he does that - I'd like to ask all the readers here IF YOU FEEL LIKE IT. To go to his comments section on the story and leave something positive.

{Reactions}
👍

[8/26/2026 7:24 PM] starcryst
https://bdallen.substack.com/p/short-story-vessel?r=2penkp&utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=post%20viewer

{Embed}
https://bdallen.substack.com/p/short-story-vessel?r=2penkp&utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&utm_medium=post%20viewer
Vessel
Short Story. A Tale of the File.
https://images-ext-1.discordapp.net/external/GjgnhA7xRsxNIce3qtnEJ8D8RT7-RqQYXgxbEHOn-2k/https/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/%24s_%21RHan%21%2Cw_1200%2Ch_675%2Cc_fill%2Cf_jpg%2Cq_auto%3Agood%2Cfl_progressive%3Asteep%2Cg_auto/https%253A%252F%252Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%252Fpublic%252Fimages%252F082746af-0369-4add-b09c-44b69822cb6e_960x635.jpeg

{Reactions}
❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:25 PM] starcryst
This is a new thing we'll be doing to support Write Club authors. Trying it for tonight

{Reactions}
💯 🔥

[8/26/2026 7:25 PM] bdallen_81124
Thank you everyone. This was all really helpful. I haven't got a critique group right now and ya'll caught all the things I'm usually blind to. 
Lunetois mentioned it's a bit too alien and ethereal. This is probably due to me just worldbuilding as I go. We're only seeing a bit, and its flash fiction so I'm resisting the urge to explain. The hope is that over the course of the stories it all becomes cohesive and filled in. I imagine there are a lot of things I will revisit and revise eventually, as I write more. But I'm enjoying creating this world as I go. 
Yes, I just finished Black Company main series last year and in the middle of Malazan.😆  THey are definitely at the forefront of my influences here. 
ANd yes to the trigger warnings. I didn't even think about with this. These stories will probably need it sense I'm not shy about the subtext of child abuse.

{Reactions}
👍 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:26 PM] josisofer
Restacks seem to help authors more than likes or even comments. Help each other grow in the algorithm

{Reactions}
❤️ (4) 💯 🦾

[8/26/2026 7:26 PM] bdallen_81124
I love a restack.

{Reactions}
👍 (2)

[8/26/2026 7:26 PM] starcryst
Did this plus a restack

{Attachments}
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/1536890704029024276/1542314388541677750/image.png?ex=6ab8fd75&is=6ab7abf5&hm=cecc630d825d119a397df7bdcb171af5ce56573c23aeebec73921bec016bc7b8&

{Reactions}
❤️ (2) 👍

[8/26/2026 7:26 PM] starcryst
just as an example


[8/26/2026 7:27 PM] starcryst
anyways -- thank you all for coming tonight and sharing some of your most precious resource, your TIME!

{Reactions}
❤️ (2) 👍

[8/26/2026 7:27 PM] starcryst
Join us in #write-club-after-party-july-through-sept-2026 for 2d drinks, 3d people and 4d shameless self promotion!

{Reactions}
❤️ (2)

[8/26/2026 7:28 PM] _randym
I had a content warning on one chapter, and I did it without spoilers by using a footnote; put "content warning" as the first line, with a footnote that said why. That saved the surprise for those not concerned with it

{Reactions}
❤️ (2)

[8/27/2026 12:22 AM] gonzpaoli
Aww, I know you meant well, but ***spoilerrr*** 😖


[8/27/2026 12:23 AM] starcryst
Sorry we had someone who complained and I was trying to protect others who would be upset by it.

{Reactions}
🫂

[8/27/2026 12:23 AM] gonzpaoli
I came in to clean the @ everyone tag, and saw the new thing you're trying, so I was going to read it... then I saw comments about content warnings, and I was more interested lmao


[8/27/2026 12:24 AM] gonzpaoli
Yes, I saw as I lurked too. I get it


[8/27/2026 12:52 AM] .revanarchy
But aren't you supposed to be writing something? 🐮


[8/27/2026 1:43 AM] gonzpaoli
Lol

Oh I didn't mean that I was going to read it *now*, I was just intrigued by the comment experiment and then dragged further in by the controversy 😂


==============================================================
Exported 114 message(s)
==============================================================